Jersey Islamic Trust

Dowries and forced marriages

There is no place in Islam for marriages arranged against a woman or mans will. This is something completely unacceptable in Islam. A marriage is invalid without the two parties' total agreement and consent. We can look at the case of Khunsâ', who's father married her off with her disapproval, so the Prophet may the peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, had her marriage annulled.

Regarding dowries, in Arabic "Mahar" this is given to a woman on the event of her wedding, this is something for the woman alone. Unlike the Hindu tradition of the arranged marriage with a woman's family receiving a large payment upon "handing over their daughter" no one has any right to any portion of it, neither her family, nor her husband. A woman may ask for whatever she wishes, whether it is money, jewellery etc. and if the man wishes to marry her, then he must give her the pre-agreed dowry of her choosing.

Allah said "O you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will. Nor should you treat them with harshness, that you may take away part of the dowry you have given them - except when they have become guilty of open lewdness. On the contrary live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If you take a dislike to them, it may be that you dislike something and Allah will bring about through it, a great deal of good." Al Quran 4:19

A young woman complained to `A'ishah the wife of the Prophet Muhammad, May the peace and blessings of Allah be upon him saying: "My father married me to his brother's son in order to raise his social status. However, I hate it." When the Prophet, May the peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, heard her complaint, he gave her the option of having the marriage annulled. She said: "O Messenger of Allah! I have accepted what my father has done. However, I wanted to know that women had a choice in the matter."

Then we have the story of Burayrah and her husband Mughîth. Both of them were slaves. When she acquired her freedom, she had the legal right of staying with her husband who was still a slave, or of leaving him. She chose to leave him and he began following after her, crying for her to return to him. The Prophet, May the peace and blessings of Allah be upon him said to her: "If only you would go back to him." She asked, "O Messenger of Allah! Are you commanding me?" He said, "No I am only pleading on his behalf." She replied: "Then I have no use for him." And that was the end of the matter.

Maysaa bint Mikail